Intention that counts.

Assalamualaikum..tonight I kinda get a shock news come out by k. fisha. She came to my room about 11pm (not specifically jotted down) just to tell me about the info she promised to tell last Saturday. Besides visiting and looking me studying, she also saw my pictures attached at the board. Whatever it was, that is not the main purpose of me writing this. In return to the subject above, I m here to tell you what are the things she promised to say.

It started with her plan to separate the upm’s anak2 naqibah into one small group which might be conducted by kak wan. Yeah, kak wan, the lady who I used to message during first day of school asking where she has been posted. I still remember that texts. Ok, back to the main topic again of why this plan out of sudden tried to be carried out. According to kak fisha, it just a matter to let us being organized in a group of four, if I m not mistaken (maybe concentrating about our prospects and so on which I couldn’t bother at first). Then the conversation carried on about 5 minutes whereby lots of objections voiced by me. It did not mean I tried to interfere grown-ups’s business or challenge their opinion, but I just tried to be real me. I m not the one who simply to say yes while the gesture of my conscience and soul say no.

Honestly, I disputed a lot and somehow I thinked it a little bit hurt k. fisha although I saw her just keep on smiling watching me talking. After that, she just nodded and said that she would tell k.sofi and k.wan about my opinion. I don’t care what they want to say about me, but at least my responsibility to be truthful relieved. About 11.15pm, the conversation ended and she left my room with a pat at my back.

Suddenly, I felt unease about what I said. Yeah, this is my problem. Always regret after doing something. After thinking quite long (4 minutes only), I text kak fisha said that I have no problem with the idea. I felt sorry to kak fisha because being so bold just now. I wrote like this ;

“salam,k.fisha after fkir2 kan, I think I dunt mind la, asalkan it’s good for us. Everything mesti akan get used jugak at the end, I m alrite. Yg pentg intention, yeah. (smile).

Then she replied;

“Gud to hear that, iA we’ll plan the best that we can possibly think. Betul sangat, innamal a’malubin niat..(smile).

Then I realize, why I must reluctantly accept the new changes that come to me which I believe everything has been planned by God. We plan, but if Allah said so, I follow. He is the best decider I ever have. It just a matter of time. I might be missing k.fisha and my usrahmates but it is ok, because my real attention is to get knowledge especially in this field. May Allah bestows us with His blessing. Amin.